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Welcome to My Crazy Life!

Just a day to day, or week to week, account of a mom, teacher, friend, wife, and regular everyday busy woman!

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

How can this be?

I remember when I was saved. Who can't, right? But when I think back on it now, I know that my heart must have been crying out for Him. I don't remember making the decision that I wanted Jesus as my Savior, but He sure knew I needed Him! Boy am I happy He knew it too! I wondered how Jesus could love me after all I had done before. I wondered why did God chose me. How can this be? I imagine that Mary was similar to so degree. She knew she didn't make that decision, but she willingly said "May it be to me as you have said." Luke 1:38.

It is amazing how many times I have had a near miss. I am going to tell on myself here, but a near miss driving mostly. When those "misses" are over, I say to myself that I have an angel riding with me. That angel is protecting me. I know that God has plans for me and He is with me all the time. But I should change it to say that God is riding with me instead of the angel, because it really is God's protection.

I am praying that through this study that I can learn to be more confident in my faith. I remember telling Natasha when I was about to start student teaching that I had to be in control of things. I couldn't stand not knowing where I was going to have to travel to in order to student teach. I was really stressed about the distance I would be from my children and forgot that God was in control and had everything worked out. Standing right in our church, I told her that I needed to be able to control this situation. Man was I wrong. God was in control the whole time. He was teaching me to trust Him. Now looking back, I was foolish to say that, and not trust Him. God had never given me any reason to doubt Him. He had things planned the way He wanted it to go. I couldn't see the entire picture. Now I can clearly see His plan for that situation. I still have trouble when I am stressed about things I can't control to just let go and give it to God. I am improving, but I still have to remember who really is in control. I have to accept His plan, just as Mary did.

My heart was calling to Him eight years ago. I needed Him. I now need to be conscience to what He is calling me to do. I need to listen better, not get caught up in my everyday life and listen to what God wants my life to be. Not what I want my life to be.


  1. Oh, those near misses! I think God uses those to wake us up.

    I think I am the worst control freak. I have planned out in my head how everything is supposed to go. I've done well with letting go, however, when things don't turn out as I have planned. I have realized that God is better than me with how the end results are supposed to turn out!

    Oh, to be able to turn everything over to him. Isn't that the ultimate goal of submission?

  2. I understand that wanting to be in control. So many times I have made plans and tried to do something and the whole time God was trying to get my attention and telling me His way was better. When we finally surrender to His plans, life is so much better. I too am working on that and trying to let go and let God.

  3. I used to be one of those people who freaked out over little things like snow days. After all, how can our students survive without getting all the content? What will happen to test scores, and will we have any summer at all. It's hard to accept that we aren't always in control. After all, even if we can't control it, we might as well enjoy it.